If you ever have to start off your explanation of love with the word “But” then you are not in love.. (I.e: “Yes he hit me, “BUT” I love him.. Or “Yes she cheated on me with my best friend, “BUT” I love her..) granted all examples may not all be so extreme but you get my point.. The bottom line is that you shouldn’t have to work extra hard to justify why you love someone, or use the fact that you “love” them as an excuse for their actions.. I see it more so in women than in men yes but men suffer from this delusional mindset as well.. It’s just not healthy for you to be so wrapped up in a person like that where you become a slave to anything they do to you and any way they treat you and call that shit love.. Who the fuck are you really fooling man?? Yourself, that’s who.. Because you’re holding on to an idea, a false perception, of this persons NON EXISTENT potential and you can’t wake up and smell the fuckin coffee to see that they fooled you and that’s not who they really are.. You can’t ACCEPT that you’re not in control and you can’t change them into being who you want them to be.. Come on now.. Come on.. I know this is getting through to you, you have to wake up and see that these situations you find yourselves in can’t possibly be passed off as love any longer.. It’s blasphemy, preposterous and down right shameful to the name of true love.. And the only way to fix it is to see the real underlying problem beneath it all.. Lack of good old fashioned, self-love..