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From a Lover’s Diary -“Want you at 2 AM”

29 Mar

I only want you when it’s 2 AM, never when it’s 2 PM. I only want you when I have to walk home alone at night and I’m scared of the way the world has become. I only want you when I watch a creepy episode of How To Get Away With Murder so I don’t have to sleep alone with fear. I only want you when my roommates are gone for the night and I hear a creepy noise in my house, and for some reason would feel safer with you around.
I only want you when I’m tossing and turning, wide awake looking for someone to talk to because no matter how many times I put down my phone and put my pillow over my head I still can’t sleep. I only want you when it’s cold in my room and I want a warm body next to me, to wrap my legs around and share body heat. I only want you when it’s convenient for me, and it’s only convenient at 2 AM.
I don’t want to try to slide out of bed without trying to wake you up in the morning. I don’t want you in the morning when I’m making breakfast for one. I don’t want you in the morning when I’m trying to get ready for work. I don’t want to have to say the awkward goodbyes when I’m trying to rush out the door.
I don’t want to look at my phone and wonder if you’ll text me. I don’t want to be hopeful that you’ll miss me because I really don’t want to miss you. I don’t want the cycle of games to begin that relationships have now evolved too.
So no matter how much I might want you at 2 AM I won’t give into you.
No matter how many nights you text me asking me what I’m doing I won’t answer because I’ll never want you in the morning.
The way I want you is to stay hidden behind the closure of my bedroom door. I don’t want the world to know about you, about us. As much as I want you it will never be enough because no matter what I’ll never want you in the morning.
There is an uneasiness about 2 AM that makes you think things you wouldn’t think at 2 PM. There is a comfort in the day, being busy, being around friends and family, and having the sun shining on your skin. But the darkness brings different feelings, darker ones. It traps you with your thoughts, makes you feel useless, maybe worthless. It makes you feel alone more than anything and no one likes feeling alone.
I hate feeling alone.

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18 Comments

Posted by on March 29, 2016 in love

 

18 responses to “From a Lover’s Diary -“Want you at 2 AM”

  1. sulagno13

    March 30, 2016 at 9:35 AM

    hahaha, that was sweet. I think anyone girlfriend, who cares,would melt down reading that.

    Liked by 1 person

     
    • ajayvyas

      March 30, 2016 at 9:37 AM

      ahh really is it so thank u so much

      Liked by 1 person

       
      • sulagno13

        March 30, 2016 at 9:40 AM

        you should try for a girlfriend bro……she would be very lucky indeed to have you

        Liked by 1 person

         
      • ajayvyas

        March 30, 2016 at 9:46 AM

        hahha bro its not cup of my tea i guess 😛 not that much gud in that as if u try to have a conersation a general one also they take it in other way

        Liked by 1 person

         
      • sulagno13

        March 30, 2016 at 9:48 AM

        yeah wo to hai hi…..they enjoy being like that thats why they are girls 😀

        Liked by 1 person

         
      • ajayvyas

        March 30, 2016 at 9:50 AM

        yeah

        Liked by 1 person

         
      • sulagno13

        March 30, 2016 at 9:51 AM

        by the way do go through a new article i posted recently…..its about a crush in college life. Hope you would enjoy it

        Liked by 1 person

         
      • ajayvyas

        March 30, 2016 at 9:52 AM

        will surely do

        Liked by 1 person

         
  2. garimanaveen

    May 24, 2016 at 6:58 PM

    Very beautiful.big fan of you now.

    Liked by 1 person

     

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