I am constantly torn between hating you and still loving u 

15 Mar

For what it’s worth I don’t think I could ever really hate you though, I think that’s always just me trying to mask how much you hurt me.. Or how much I let you hurt me.. I honestly don’t  know anymore.. But I’m just trying to make peace.. With myself, my bleeding  heart, and you, even if you held the knife or pulled the trigger or what ever the  you did.. It is what it is at this point and I just want to be happy, with.. Or  with out you .. And I want that for you too, with or without me, and at this point I really hope it’s without each other because there has GOT TO BE BETTER THAN THIS.. Imagine that, we both have yet to experience the best thing that’s coming for us, that’s just a beautiful concept to me and it’s been the only thing getting me through from one day to the next.. I will always love you, make no mistake about that, because that’s just who I am.. Hell you weren’t the first person I fell in love with and broke my heart, you might not even be the last.. But somehow I always manage to find love again, or it find me temporarily just like it did with you, just to remind me that I have to keep going.. It gets better every time I swear it does, and even though I would of swore this was it and with you would be the forever I’ve been looking for.. I swear I’m learning to find so much peace in understanding that the best has yet to come.. So this is me letting go, perhaps maybe not forever, but for now.


Posted by on March 15, 2017 in Heartbreak


2 responses to “I am constantly torn between hating you and still loving u 

  1. Shreya Sharma

    March 15, 2017 at 11:26 AM

    This is so relatable ❤️

    Liked by 1 person


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