“Hey wake up, we’re at the last stop” I hear him say. I open my eyes immediately and look out the window. It’s already dark outside. Oh god. What have I done? Getting into a bus that I didn’t even know where it was going. What was I thinking? Well I wasn’t thinking otherwise I wouldn’t be in this situation with him. On second thought he came here following me. He’s getting up and walking toward the door and I follow. It’s still raining outside so I open my umbrella and we both get under it and start walking.
“Do you know where we are? I’ve never heard of the station name before.” I ask. I’m not really sure to where we’re walking but it looks like we’re going to a street with more people. The city lights are visible and it looks far away. “Yeah it’s just a small city that’s not that popular. I haven’t been here before but I’ve heard it’s nothing special” he answers calmly as if this is just another normal night for him. And I’m starting to get nervous. I hope he doesn’t notice so I take a deep breath and start talking like everything is fine. “What should we do now? I mean we have class on the first period and the last bus and train of the day has already left” I say looking at him. It may look like skipping school wouldn’t be that much of a big deal do me considering I did that today and have been doing that almost every other week. But if I keep this going there’s a high chance that I might fail. Forgetting why I got into university in the first place when classes and life get too hard is a typical occurrence for me. I skipped the same class 3 times and if I do it one more time my attendance wouldn’t be enough to pass so I have to get there tomorrow. “Should we just take the first train? I think we can make it if we run to school from the station.” he says looking at me. Does this mean we’re gonna spend the night together? The first thought I have isn’t uneasiness that I’m gonna spend the night with a guy in some small town that neither of us really know. The nervousness that I felt a few minutes ago starts to fade because I’m just starting to realize that he’s not just anyone. We were friends at one time even though that feels like an eternity ago. But I still feel at ease with him. “Yeah let’s do that. Should we find a motel or something?” I say. “Yes but don’t you get too excited” he says grinning to himself. “I’ll try to keep my hands to myself haha” I say.
The first thought I have is that I’m not gonna be alone tonight. Nights are the toughest part of the day because when it’s dark and I have no distractions, the only thing left is just me and my thoughts. I’m stuck with myself and at times it starts go get hard whenever I’m alone. Which is pretty crazy since I’m alone basically all the time. I wasn’t always like this and honestly I don’t remember when things started to get like this. It’s been that long. But when I’m with him things start to feel a little lighter, a lot more bearable.
“What happened to your umbrella by the way?” I ask. “Oh umbrellas are for losers who are afraid of getting wet” and for a split second I think that he’s being serious. I don’t know what got in me in this moment, maybe because it’s dark and it’s raining, or maybe the fact that I’m out of town with someone who makes me feel at ease but excited at the same time. Probably both. “Oh really?” I say giving him a serious face and close my umbrella in one swift motion and start running as fast as I can. I look back and he’s running after me laughing and I’m laughing too. If he wanted to catch up with me he totally could, I’m not that fast of a runner. I slow down and turn back to face him. He stops running but we’re both still laughing. There aren’t anyone around us since it’s really late and we’re practically in the middle of nowhere. The only sound we hear is the sound of the rain. I know that we have to go to school tomorrow. I know that this night is not permanent just like the other ones. I know that the thoughts that creep into my head during the night won’t go away easily. But in this moment, when we’re wet from the rain, with tears in our eyes from laughing too hard, and the way he is looking at me is so warm that it feels like coming home, I don’t care about anything else and it’s just us.